Ha! Finally a real official letter from my college that I shall start my studies next September with the blessing of Plymouth University. They shall be amazed of the range of movement of my neck! They are absolutely everywhere. C'MON! Good looking gorgeous men! (I know what to wear next Halloween: I'll be an owl!) Only if my head doesn't drop of my shoulders before that..

Anyway..Unfortunately the pub and junk food culture shows around as well. I have never seen so many beer stomachs and man boobs in my life!

They are so fair in the pubs that the pint is usually always FULL. Nothing like the finnish style of keeping everything half empty. (Why we finns let our emotional depression effect also to the pint sizes?)

It's unbelievable how much they sell trash food here in the stores. Sometimes it's really hard to find something decent to eat besides crisps and produced foods. How come they eat crisps even for a lunch?!

The western laziness has gone so far that you can order everything from the shop as a home delivery. I myself got so exited about this thing because (now no-one will have any idea of my drinking habits..) it's really exhausting to carry all the food I can eat from miles away... Now I can order everything straight to home without braking nails OR shoes!In Waitrose you can even add instructions for your personal shopper. My imagination got a bit wild at this point:

"Could you pls check that the tomatoes shine nicely in the rainbow colour?.."

"...last time my salads aura was too stuffy and it seemed that it has been surrounded by bad energies. Could you pls sing some nice songs to it before bagging it  just to make it feel a bit happier?"..

"I wan't my pork to be nice and tender... nice to touch... "

"I wan't my cucumber look strong and brisk!"

"Pls hide some personal surprise in my shopping bags!"

You know the feeling when:

The english are so polite that they keep on reminding you how blond you can be: 

1. This independent woman wen't to Boots to buy some hair-, face etc. products. In 5 min I had quite a lot of stuff in my arms when first the bouncer asked if I needed a basket:

"No no.. I'm just fine! Looking only a one product more!"

Then the young shop assistant boy asked the same thing:

"No no no... I'm ok! A few more things..."

And then the indian tight mouthed man brought me a basked without saying a word. Just looking me with his eyes shouting: "Take the bloody basket WOMAN!"

2. I was sitting in a tube all dressed up, looking good and applied some more of lip gloss before my stop when with a mirror in my hand walked to the doors and waited them to open when this old english guy next to me opened his mouth:

"Hey miss... the doors open from the other side..."

And started laughing.

A funny situation at work:

This old lovely couple walked in and the lady opened her mouth and took a hold of my hand:

"Could you please make my husband feel more comfortable in his glasses?"

"Well of course! As comfortable as I can!"

I adjusted the frames arms a little bit tighter because the glasses had a bad habit to fall a little bit. When I brought them back I told them what I did and pointed out that now they were 

"...not too loose or too tight!"

The lady somehow started smiling with this sparkle in her eyes and replied:

"Oh.. not too loose nor too tight. I like that!.." and laughed a bit mischievously.

And of course I couldn't keep any poker face in that situation!

Well the couple was happy and the lady even asked me to join them for a pint. But unfortunately I had to work. My supervisor saw the situation and a smile on his face warned me that the lady might be a matchmaker so I should be careful! "You may end up dating his son or neighbor..or cousin etc.... actually that could be good for you..." 

It seems that I'll be having a nice and exiting time in London when my colleagues and customers try to arrange me together with someone...

Actually one funny regular customer calls me already by the name "the woman of his life". These people here are crazy!

A rainy day off from work so what shall we do?... Of course run to the Saatchi Gallery to have some FUN! 

I like art and artists. Sometimes things just go way over the limits of my understanding and then you pull the best solution for "being unwise": Smile and pose and giggle and pose and smile and pose and play and show some skin and pose and laugh and  keep on smiling.....!

We decided to go for a road trip..

...and met really strange looking people...

...It was really hard to see witch sex they represented...

Then we noticed that there were some problems with our eyes..

Oh no... wait a moment... it's due to those bloody mushrooms we ate earlier!.. "Johanna! Damn you..!"

"But that man told me that they were all fine.."

"Yeah right...and I'm Kate Moss!"

...Before leaving Johanna still wanted to store the image of the yellow cave and that man (I knew that there was some chemistry between them. HA!)........

The bouncer in this place wasn't the nicest one. She actually made us sing 10 X God save the queen in sex pistols version and then forced us to have a decent and nice conversation over some haggish with a sexy leprechaun dancing in the background until she god bored with us. But got to admit that she still looks fabulous! 

After getting out of that place we were immediately  sucked into this huge black hole!

You couldn't tell anymore what was the sky and what was the floor! (But for one thing I was pretty sure.. It really smelled bad there!)

...then we woke up to realize that we were surrounded by these savages who were graving for my Primark shoes!

...The only way out was to join the wild and dubious ritual dance... 

"By the skillful and sustained use of propaganda, one can make a people see even heaven as hell or an extremely wretched life as paradise."

"Kirsi I have a cunning plan!..."

And then Johanna switched to cannabis and started to show off...

...That really pissed me off! So just to be polite I wrote all that is in my heart to one of guided journals...

Oh my! Where this adventure leads me?...